i just went out and bought a number of groceries i’m really excited about. 

i also put together my lunches for the rest of the week, and i made a citrus water that is supposed to fast track fat burning.

(and i also bought a new pack of cigarettes, my bad.) 

school is almost out, and so then i’ll be able to focus on eating clean, working out, and figuring my self out. 

i just need to make it through another week.

xxo

STATS

• age: 20
• height: 5’1
• current weight: 143
• highest weight: 158
• lowest weight: 125
• GOAL WEIGHT: 119

REWARDS

• 5 pounds lost: dye hair pink
• 10 pounds lost: second ear piercing
• 15 pounds lost: tbd
• 20 pounds lost: tbd
• GOAL WEIGHT: TATTOO AND HAPPINESS

i nearly forgot about this blog, im really sorry.

i just did my first workout in months. i’ve gained weight probably since last i used this blog, but i’m starting the journey (again) to lose it. i hope you join and encourage me.

xo

the problem with recovering from binging and purging is you dont quite recover from binging and then you’re just getting more fat.

i’m so unhappy right now. i hate myself so much. i’ve tried so hard to refrain from returning to thinspo.. but I don’t know what else to do.

i am not in a good place. i need you all. i need thinspo.

hi everyone. ive missed you.

x Olive

epiphaniesdesire asked: I just want help,I have an athletic body which i dislike but I suppose it could be worse. I just want the infamous inner thigh gap. Tips please?

hi! i am honestly not the person to ask about this because my legs are the farthest thing from a thigh-gap you will see, but i can help best to my ability! my advice wont be from personal experience, but i am happy to share some exercises that i’ve done that i can tell work out my thighs. :)

i recently saw this video tagged - it’s the Call Me Maybe Mighty Squat Challenge. i’ve yet to do it, but i’m excited to! click here to watch it!

i think, really, squats are key. here’s a detailed explanation of what you should do: 

preform 3 to 5 sets of each exercise. 15 reps per set. four times a week. it should take you about ten minutes :)

begin with good posture, stand with your feet hip width apart, and your arms extended in front of you at chest level. square your shoulders and keep your chest up.

slowly bend your knees until your thighs are parallel to the floor all the while trying to maintain balance. slowly, while squeezing your butt and tightening your legs, push through the floor and start standing back up to starting position. take two counts to lower your lower your body down and four counts to rise back up! :)

also, running is a great way to trim fat from your entire body, and keep your legs strong. it’s great for overall weight loss, and will perk up your butt which will help achieve the thigh gap.

like i said, i don’t have a thigh gap, so this isn’t from personal experience. but this is what i’m doing to get there as well.

i hope it helps, love!

does anyone else have any good or fun tips for epiphanysimone?

x Olive

// last night i had a dream that//

i was watching, like, a video of me this time last year. and i was wearing a skirt and a sort of crop top (an outfit i’ve worn many times, and was wearing again in the dream.)
as i watched myself in the video, past-me lifted her arms, and i could see my ribcage beautifully.
and then i looked down and noticed how covered they are today. how soft. how hidden behind college and fat.
and i began to panic. i watched as i walked around happily on the video, and couldn’t breath as i realized how far that person has slipped away.
i held my arms around my stomach. soft. pudgy. squishy.
and i woke up.
…
i am going at it hard today.
no more messing around.
x Olive